Song Request

I was just asked by someone to write a song about her moms extremely large nipples.
I immediately started thinking the exact same thing you guys are- "Is your mom single?"

Apparently the mom nipples are large in length not diameter, with a span of maybe an inch and a half. At first I thought it was kind of weird that she had this fascination with her moms body parts, then I thought "Hey that's kind of hot", then I thought "Hey that's kind of creepy", and then finally later on that night by myself I thought it was kind of hot again.

She says she wants me to record the song so she can play it for her mom, but I don't usually write requested songs. I usually just get drunk and write about love. I'm not even sure how to start writing a song about extremely long mom nipples, and even if I did I'm pretty sure it wouldn't be all that flattering. Let's say I do write this nipple song, is it ok to ask for pictures? You guys got any ideas? What rhymes with nipple?

I apologize for any discomfort this post may have caused

Check It Out

I got numorous request to get some songs up on the net so people could hear 'em , and what do I get? Zippo- I got nothing- No responses- Nothing.

I need a drink.

Drunken Quote Of The Day

"You're so cute when you're slurring your speech,
but they're closing the bar and they want us to leave."

Death Cab For Cutie- Crooked Teeth

My Space

Ok I have joined the My Space crowd.
I did this because it was the easiest way I could find to get a couple of my songs up on the net.

I'm not very good with this computer stuff so I haven't got it linked up yet, but if you go to this website I'm under Paul & The Violent Farmers (or you can probably find me under Paul Shields too). Aimee did a great job of hooking it up and designing it so make sure you check it out.

The songs are up too, so let me know what you think.



Keep Singin' & Drinkin'